It's all about being aware of what is going on, and help the other gain awareness of what is going on.

1. LISTENING A peer coach listen with their eyes as well as with their ears. Many feelings are expressed in a non-verbal way. As well as listening to what is being said, it is important to listen to how it is being said.

2. ATTENDING A peer coach shows that they are listening and that they care about what the other person is saying. Helpful attending behaviours:

   • maintaining helpful eye-contact
   • keeping a relaxed posture
   • not interrupting
   • using encouraging responses like nodding, saying “mmm”, “I understand”, “I see what you mean”, etc.

   Non-helpful, non-attending behaviours include:

   • doing something else while listening
   • looking away from the other person
   • interrupting
   • fidgeting
   • doodling
   • sitting at an awkward angle

3. CLARIFYING A peer coach makes sure they understand 100% what is being said. It includes asking questions, repeating statements, and asking the other person to give more details, but never like in an interrogation session.

4. REFLECTING A peer coach shows understanding by repeating what is being said in their own words. It means showing an understanding of the other's feelings.

5. RECOGNISING FEELINGS It is important for the coach to be aware of how the coachee feels about the task, related problems, his/her own abilities, or other people. It is also important for the coach to be aware of, and to recognise his/her own feelings and how these might be influencing the situation. Your supervisor can help you with this.

6. SUSPENDING JUDGEMENT It is very easy, when listening to thoughts and ideas, to place our own judgments on them. Although it is difficult, a peer coach keeps an open mind, and suspends judgment.

7. DRAWING OUT There may be occasions when the coachee is not very forthcoming, opened up, or just ‘dries up’. Here, a peer coach will need to draw them out, carefully using open questions designed to help the coachee focus on relevant issues. Questions such as “Why?”, “How do you know that?”, “What makes you think that?”

8. SUPPORTING Sometimes a coachee may go through a loss of self-confidence. A peer coach needs to be able to notice and help the coachee through supportive behaviours: giving encouragement, helping the coachee recognise success, declaring confidence in them.

9. USE OF SILENCE Silence can be uncomfortable. When it happens, there might be an urgency to fill it. Empty words can hinder a coaching situation. It is important to allow time and space for reflection. A peer coach manages silence, uses it to give time to explore issues. It gives the coach time to evaluate the situation and think through the next step of the coaching process.

10. SUMMARISING There are times when essential elements need to be brought together in context and restated or summarised.

Sources:

1. https://media.nesta.org.uk/documents/peer_coaching_learning_guide.pdf